Monday, March 31, 2008
Gangsters Roll Up To My Table
We were almost closed down at the restaurant, tables are clean, food is put away, and the entire staff is nervously watching the clock waiting to leave.
We hear the door creak open and poof! By some sort of ghetto magic, two of the roughest looking dudes walk through the front door of our restaurant at the worst possible time. Cooks are throwing pots and pans, servers are drawing straws to see who stays late, and the manager has just disappeared into the office to surf the internet. And of course, I draw that shortest of short straws.
So after many recounts I finally decide to just man up and take on the table. "Y'all got some shweet tea?"
"Yes sir, we do and it is very fine tonight." I sarcastically reply.
"We gonna have some that, and two cheeseburgers." My new pain in the ass customer replies.
So I take the order, enter it in the kitchen, argue with the cook about cooking the food, then grab their drinks. I hate it when tables come into the restaurant right before close. I especially hate it, because it is never someone who wants to tip you fifty bucks and order an excellent meal with a bottle of wine. It is always some ghetto thugs and their friends who come in and order the cheapest crap on the menu. But, I am a professional, and I give the same service to everyone regardless of race, gender, creed, or time you walked into the restaurant. So I serve these guys with the same respect that I serve anyone.
After two recooks and lots of sweet tea refills, my late stay table is finally ready to pay and leave. Much to all of our pleasure they promptly thank me for my service and settle their bill. After the gentlemen have left the building I look down at my tip, I never check the payment until the guys are gone, If they short me I can chase them down still, but if the tip is bad they are not around to hear my profanity about them. Fifty dollars on a twenty dollar tab.
Wow
People never fail to surprise me in this industry. I can't possibly understand why people are racist. After my experience with serving people from many different countries and cultures, people of different religions and colors, I find no difference between anyone except for how they tip. I have had the dirtiest rednecks and the blackest thugs in my restaurant, and those are usually the better tips. Sure, I get stiffed from time to time, but that happens with everyone, not just a particular race of people. I do believe that racism from the restaurant stems from tip prejudice, black people are seen as bad tippers, when in fact just as many white people as blacks tend to be poor tippers, but the majority of my clientèle is white. So when a black table walks in, the odds are against you getting a good tip from them. Not because they are poor, just because you won't see as many of them, so when you do get those tables, your average tip is poor.
I hand it to most of my black tables though. Servers have this general rule about eating out, if you can't afford your food let alone the tip to pay for your service, then don't eat out. The reason why we see less blacks in our restaurant is probably because they wait until they can afford all of it, or my personal theory is that the black community still has strong family values and just tend to cook more rather than eat out. Same thing with my redneck tables, and Asian tables, and so on. I truly try to give better service to these tables, since my tip should be good, and they are truly looking for a dining experience, not just a quick meal that they didn't have to cook.
People still surprise me on a day to day basis though, you never really know what your next table will be or what will happen with them.
We hear the door creak open and poof! By some sort of ghetto magic, two of the roughest looking dudes walk through the front door of our restaurant at the worst possible time. Cooks are throwing pots and pans, servers are drawing straws to see who stays late, and the manager has just disappeared into the office to surf the internet. And of course, I draw that shortest of short straws.
So after many recounts I finally decide to just man up and take on the table. "Y'all got some shweet tea?"
"Yes sir, we do and it is very fine tonight." I sarcastically reply.
"We gonna have some that, and two cheeseburgers." My new pain in the ass customer replies.
So I take the order, enter it in the kitchen, argue with the cook about cooking the food, then grab their drinks. I hate it when tables come into the restaurant right before close. I especially hate it, because it is never someone who wants to tip you fifty bucks and order an excellent meal with a bottle of wine. It is always some ghetto thugs and their friends who come in and order the cheapest crap on the menu. But, I am a professional, and I give the same service to everyone regardless of race, gender, creed, or time you walked into the restaurant. So I serve these guys with the same respect that I serve anyone.
After two recooks and lots of sweet tea refills, my late stay table is finally ready to pay and leave. Much to all of our pleasure they promptly thank me for my service and settle their bill. After the gentlemen have left the building I look down at my tip, I never check the payment until the guys are gone, If they short me I can chase them down still, but if the tip is bad they are not around to hear my profanity about them. Fifty dollars on a twenty dollar tab.
Wow
People never fail to surprise me in this industry. I can't possibly understand why people are racist. After my experience with serving people from many different countries and cultures, people of different religions and colors, I find no difference between anyone except for how they tip. I have had the dirtiest rednecks and the blackest thugs in my restaurant, and those are usually the better tips. Sure, I get stiffed from time to time, but that happens with everyone, not just a particular race of people. I do believe that racism from the restaurant stems from tip prejudice, black people are seen as bad tippers, when in fact just as many white people as blacks tend to be poor tippers, but the majority of my clientèle is white. So when a black table walks in, the odds are against you getting a good tip from them. Not because they are poor, just because you won't see as many of them, so when you do get those tables, your average tip is poor.
I hand it to most of my black tables though. Servers have this general rule about eating out, if you can't afford your food let alone the tip to pay for your service, then don't eat out. The reason why we see less blacks in our restaurant is probably because they wait until they can afford all of it, or my personal theory is that the black community still has strong family values and just tend to cook more rather than eat out. Same thing with my redneck tables, and Asian tables, and so on. I truly try to give better service to these tables, since my tip should be good, and they are truly looking for a dining experience, not just a quick meal that they didn't have to cook.
People still surprise me on a day to day basis though, you never really know what your next table will be or what will happen with them.
Labels: blacks, food, restaurant, tables, tips
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Would You Like Some French Fries on That Salad?
100% true story.
It is a busy Friday night at the restaurant. Most of the sections are full and we are beginning to go on our usual wait. One of my co-workers get sat with a five top of the classiest people we have had in our restaurant that night. Ok, you got me, they were wearing overalls and asked if we had Bush beer. Anyway, as the story goes, my friend is taking the five top's order when something completely unexpected happens.
"And what may I get for you mam?" my friend asks.
"I would like the house salad with some fries." The redneck responds.
"Ok, one house salad and a side of fries." The server repeats back.
"Well, actually I want the fries on the salad." She responds
"What?" My now dumbfounded friend finally manages to say.
"Yea, just put the fries on the salad for me."
"Coming right up."
Now I have been serving in various restaurants for well almost three years now. In this time I have observed some strange eating habits of our species. Chicken pastas with no chicken, steaks with cheddar cheese added to them, and even the mushroom removed from our mushroom sandwich, which made the sandwich literally bread, cheese, lettuce and tomato. But never have I heard of adding french fries to salads.
Of course, our head cook decides to be funny when he sees the order walk in, and adds a side of ketchup to the salad instead of dressing. We all have a good laugh at this.
Now the salad has gone out to the table, and of course the lady asks for more ketchup, and proceeds to smother the salad with ketchup. Repeatedly.
Come on America. You ask why is everyone so fat, you ask why health care costs so much, and you ask why everyone seems to be sick all the time. That is your answer. Because dumb people like this one takes a perfectly health meal and destroys any nutritional value the salad might have had. This is your answer.
People in my restaurant get excited about fried appetizers with a side of grease added to it. Some people will eat enough food to feed at least a hundred starving Cambodians, and they will do it in one sitting. Then to top everything off, when I don't believe another morsel of food could possible fit into one person, you ask for desert and then gorge the thing like you have never ate before. This is why your fat.
Most restaurant actually offer healthy meal choices. Low carb, low calorie, and no trans fat menus are all over the place. You just have to make better choices. This is also why our government would rather finance a war than pay for our skyrocketing health care costs. They know that if health care was free, all these whales of Americas would be in their doctor's office the next day getting their much needed arteries unclogged so they can down another two meals at dinner.
I understand that some people have real problems with their weight. Maybe it is genetic, or something doesn't work the way it should, causing you to gain too much weight. But most of the over sized patrons of my restaurant do it to themselves. And I have no sympathy for that.
Oh yea, and diet coke really isn't going to help you all that much when you drink eight of them before I deliver your meal, get some water.
It is a busy Friday night at the restaurant. Most of the sections are full and we are beginning to go on our usual wait. One of my co-workers get sat with a five top of the classiest people we have had in our restaurant that night. Ok, you got me, they were wearing overalls and asked if we had Bush beer. Anyway, as the story goes, my friend is taking the five top's order when something completely unexpected happens.
"And what may I get for you mam?" my friend asks.
"I would like the house salad with some fries." The redneck responds.
"Ok, one house salad and a side of fries." The server repeats back.
"Well, actually I want the fries on the salad." She responds
"What?" My now dumbfounded friend finally manages to say.
"Yea, just put the fries on the salad for me."
"Coming right up."
Now I have been serving in various restaurants for well almost three years now. In this time I have observed some strange eating habits of our species. Chicken pastas with no chicken, steaks with cheddar cheese added to them, and even the mushroom removed from our mushroom sandwich, which made the sandwich literally bread, cheese, lettuce and tomato. But never have I heard of adding french fries to salads.
Of course, our head cook decides to be funny when he sees the order walk in, and adds a side of ketchup to the salad instead of dressing. We all have a good laugh at this.
Now the salad has gone out to the table, and of course the lady asks for more ketchup, and proceeds to smother the salad with ketchup. Repeatedly.
Come on America. You ask why is everyone so fat, you ask why health care costs so much, and you ask why everyone seems to be sick all the time. That is your answer. Because dumb people like this one takes a perfectly health meal and destroys any nutritional value the salad might have had. This is your answer.
People in my restaurant get excited about fried appetizers with a side of grease added to it. Some people will eat enough food to feed at least a hundred starving Cambodians, and they will do it in one sitting. Then to top everything off, when I don't believe another morsel of food could possible fit into one person, you ask for desert and then gorge the thing like you have never ate before. This is why your fat.
Most restaurant actually offer healthy meal choices. Low carb, low calorie, and no trans fat menus are all over the place. You just have to make better choices. This is also why our government would rather finance a war than pay for our skyrocketing health care costs. They know that if health care was free, all these whales of Americas would be in their doctor's office the next day getting their much needed arteries unclogged so they can down another two meals at dinner.
I understand that some people have real problems with their weight. Maybe it is genetic, or something doesn't work the way it should, causing you to gain too much weight. But most of the over sized patrons of my restaurant do it to themselves. And I have no sympathy for that.
Oh yea, and diet coke really isn't going to help you all that much when you drink eight of them before I deliver your meal, get some water.
Labels: food, health, politics, restaurnat, serving, weight
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