Hazy College Days
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Friday, April 4, 2008

 

What a long weekend

Well I got good news and bad news.

Good news is that i just finished working two doubles in a row, and I have ALOT of stories to write about.

Bad news is that I am way too tired to write a decent story, so to the three people that read this blog, please be patient and good stuff will come.

Q

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

 

Where did all the leaders go?

We watched some videos in history class the other day about the civil rights movements. Having never been properly educated about the movement, I was blown away.

The people we watched these films on were amazing. They were so alive, and believed completely in their cause. It was almost like they were put on this earth to start and finish this movement for their people. None of the people in the film were bitter either. After all of the harsh and cruel things that were done to them, they were not bitter about the people who did it to them. I think this is what surprised me the most. Hell, half the time, the people were laughing when they talked about being beaten or cursed at.

These films made me question our current society though, where did all of these leaders go to? We need some people in our country to stand up for the little man and find just solutions to our current problems. It seems as if everyone has lost the spirit, the fire that made everyone want to stand up and protect what was theirs and fix the injustices. Maybe it is a good sign though, that all the problems we have are too minimal to cause any real discussions over. But then again, aren't the little problems worth fixing too? Should we disturb the tranquility of our little pond over bad banking practices and corrupt politicians? Or maybe we can continue living comfortably and hope that all of these problems just go away.

Everywhere I look though, it seems that we no longer have these energetic young leaders who are willing to walk through fire just to fix an issue. Where did they all go, and how does our country produce these leaders again?

My teacher also compared the campaign of Kennedy to the campaign of Obama, saying that the two were similar in the amount of excitement surrounding the two candidates. Maybe the sixties are coming back in style, hopefully our excited young leaders will come along with them too. Though I think we could do with a few less hippies this time and more educated American students.

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Monday, March 31, 2008

 

Gangsters Roll Up To My Table

We were almost closed down at the restaurant, tables are clean, food is put away, and the entire staff is nervously watching the clock waiting to leave.

We hear the door creak open and poof! By some sort of ghetto magic, two of the roughest looking dudes walk through the front door of our restaurant at the worst possible time. Cooks are throwing pots and pans, servers are drawing straws to see who stays late, and the manager has just disappeared into the office to surf the internet. And of course, I draw that shortest of short straws.

So after many recounts I finally decide to just man up and take on the table. "Y'all got some shweet tea?"

"Yes sir, we do and it is very fine tonight." I sarcastically reply.

"We gonna have some that, and two cheeseburgers." My new pain in the ass customer replies.

So I take the order, enter it in the kitchen, argue with the cook about cooking the food, then grab their drinks. I hate it when tables come into the restaurant right before close. I especially hate it, because it is never someone who wants to tip you fifty bucks and order an excellent meal with a bottle of wine. It is always some ghetto thugs and their friends who come in and order the cheapest crap on the menu. But, I am a professional, and I give the same service to everyone regardless of race, gender, creed, or time you walked into the restaurant. So I serve these guys with the same respect that I serve anyone.

After two recooks and lots of sweet tea refills, my late stay table is finally ready to pay and leave. Much to all of our pleasure they promptly thank me for my service and settle their bill. After the gentlemen have left the building I look down at my tip, I never check the payment until the guys are gone, If they short me I can chase them down still, but if the tip is bad they are not around to hear my profanity about them. Fifty dollars on a twenty dollar tab.

Wow

People never fail to surprise me in this industry. I can't possibly understand why people are racist. After my experience with serving people from many different countries and cultures, people of different religions and colors, I find no difference between anyone except for how they tip. I have had the dirtiest rednecks and the blackest thugs in my restaurant, and those are usually the better tips. Sure, I get stiffed from time to time, but that happens with everyone, not just a particular race of people. I do believe that racism from the restaurant stems from tip prejudice, black people are seen as bad tippers, when in fact just as many white people as blacks tend to be poor tippers, but the majority of my clientèle is white. So when a black table walks in, the odds are against you getting a good tip from them. Not because they are poor, just because you won't see as many of them, so when you do get those tables, your average tip is poor.

I hand it to most of my black tables though. Servers have this general rule about eating out, if you can't afford your food let alone the tip to pay for your service, then don't eat out. The reason why we see less blacks in our restaurant is probably because they wait until they can afford all of it, or my personal theory is that the black community still has strong family values and just tend to cook more rather than eat out. Same thing with my redneck tables, and Asian tables, and so on. I truly try to give better service to these tables, since my tip should be good, and they are truly looking for a dining experience, not just a quick meal that they didn't have to cook.

People still surprise me on a day to day basis though, you never really know what your next table will be or what will happen with them.

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Saturday, March 29, 2008

 

Support the economy

Everyone says the economy is going into a recession. Well, then we all need to do our part to help bring it back up.

GO SPEND MONEY. We talked about this in my economics class, the more people spend, the more money business have, and the more jobs they can have. Its called the multiplier effect or something to that extent.

There is a trick to doing your part to bring our economy out of recession though, you must keep your money in the country. One problem with the multiplier theory, is that if the money is not kept within the economy, then the dollar still multiples, except it multiplies in a country other than ours. For instance if you buy something from wall-mart, it was more than likely made in China. Now the dollar you spent at wally world, has left our economy and multiplied in China. I know some economist will prove me wrong, but this is the basics of the theory.

So I have done my part to support the economy, I bought a new TV. I bought my TV from a local SMALL BUSINESS, and got quite a good deal on it. Now, I could have gone to any larger retailer, and probably would have gotten a better deal, but in order for my patriotism to feel satisfied, I had to buy from the small guy. Small business supports over 90% of jobs in our country, yet these business do not support 90% of the Gross Domestic Product. Small business is the workhorse of our economy, so it needs our support. If you buy from these overly large corporations, in the spirit of making even more profit, they will spend the money in smaller, less developed countries at a cheaper price.

You can vote for a president, and not see any real change. Same thing with senators and governors, etc. none of them can really change anything, your vote is of little value, yet still important. If you really want your vote to count, if you really love the freedoms we enjoy on a daily basis, and wish to someday hand a beautiful land with free people living on it down to your children on so on, then you must use the strongest vote that everyone has. Vote with your money.

Money, unfortunately, does make our world go round. Without it, America would not be the young leader that it is. So that means that every dollar you make, and spend, is a vote. Lately, our votes have been going to outsourcing, corrupt banking practices, and foreign made goods. We must support our own country and not everyone else's, buy American, support small business, and make sure you know where your dollar will go after it is out of your hands. The government is giving many people rebates within the next couple of months, so do the right thing and spend every dime they give back, and make sure that dollar stays American.

Sorry for the economics/civics lesson, I will have more restaurant stories coming Monday night.

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Thursday, March 27, 2008

 

Easy Come, Easy Go

Working in a restaurant, is kind of like working in another society. Restaurants have their own unwritten rules. For instance, if you get off work, then go back to work later and get a discount on your meal and you had someone serve you, then you leave the amount of the discount for the tip. Just one of those rules in most restaurants, like how sweet tea here in the south, is always the tea urn on the left. Just the way things are.

Restaurants also have roughly six different types of personalities that work in them. You always have the wanna be management type, the coolest guy in the world type, the overly stressed about nothing type, and so on. The six same types of people work in restaurants because these six people get along together, and they also don't get along well. Drama, as well as very fun parties, tend to happen when these six types of people mix and get along. This is what makes working in a restaurant fun.

Well yesterday a friend of mine quit/got fired. The managers say he was fired, and of course my friend says he told them where to shove it. Doesn't really matter how it happened, it was definitely mutual. So now our restaurant is down one of our six personalities, the laid back personality. My friend filled this spot in our restaurant very well, so well that we didn't even really need anymore of the laid back type. Oh well, a new batch of trainees will be in soon, with their little books, and shirts that just came out of the bag. Haha trainees. Maybe out of this batch of innocent youth, we will find one that can help us fill this newly created gap in the social atmosphere of our restaurant.

With the economy in a tough spot, and no chance of getting away from being broke, many servers are loosing hope. Hardly anyone can really remember the good ol days of plentiful money and endless parties. Now everyone is pushing forty hours a week just to make some money to put food on the table and keep the lights on. Stay in there, keep working hard and something good will come your way. You never know, maybe you can impress the next table you get so much that they would want to hire you. Easy come, easy go

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Tuesday, March 25, 2008

 

Would You Like Some French Fries on That Salad?

100% true story.

It is a busy Friday night at the restaurant. Most of the sections are full and we are beginning to go on our usual wait. One of my co-workers get sat with a five top of the classiest people we have had in our restaurant that night. Ok, you got me, they were wearing overalls and asked if we had Bush beer. Anyway, as the story goes, my friend is taking the five top's order when something completely unexpected happens.

"And what may I get for you mam?" my friend asks.

"I would like the house salad with some fries." The redneck responds.

"Ok, one house salad and a side of fries." The server repeats back.

"Well, actually I want the fries on the salad." She responds

"What?" My now dumbfounded friend finally manages to say.

"Yea, just put the fries on the salad for me."

"Coming right up."

Now I have been serving in various restaurants for well almost three years now. In this time I have observed some strange eating habits of our species. Chicken pastas with no chicken, steaks with cheddar cheese added to them, and even the mushroom removed from our mushroom sandwich, which made the sandwich literally bread, cheese, lettuce and tomato. But never have I heard of adding french fries to salads.

Of course, our head cook decides to be funny when he sees the order walk in, and adds a side of ketchup to the salad instead of dressing. We all have a good laugh at this.

Now the salad has gone out to the table, and of course the lady asks for more ketchup, and proceeds to smother the salad with ketchup. Repeatedly.

Come on America. You ask why is everyone so fat, you ask why health care costs so much, and you ask why everyone seems to be sick all the time. That is your answer. Because dumb people like this one takes a perfectly health meal and destroys any nutritional value the salad might have had. This is your answer.

People in my restaurant get excited about fried appetizers with a side of grease added to it. Some people will eat enough food to feed at least a hundred starving Cambodians, and they will do it in one sitting. Then to top everything off, when I don't believe another morsel of food could possible fit into one person, you ask for desert and then gorge the thing like you have never ate before. This is why your fat.

Most restaurant actually offer healthy meal choices. Low carb, low calorie, and no trans fat menus are all over the place. You just have to make better choices. This is also why our government would rather finance a war than pay for our skyrocketing health care costs. They know that if health care was free, all these whales of Americas would be in their doctor's office the next day getting their much needed arteries unclogged so they can down another two meals at dinner.

I understand that some people have real problems with their weight. Maybe it is genetic, or something doesn't work the way it should, causing you to gain too much weight. But most of the over sized patrons of my restaurant do it to themselves. And I have no sympathy for that.

Oh yea, and diet coke really isn't going to help you all that much when you drink eight of them before I deliver your meal, get some water.

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Sunday, March 23, 2008

 

Questions for the Easter Bunny

Now that I have a venue that can reach billions of people around the world, I have some very important questions I have been wanting to ask. No, I do not want to ask about peace or war, poverty or riches. I would much rather ask a few questions to the Easter Bunny himself/herself. I mean come on, if the Easter bunny is out there, then it must have internet.

Alright Rabbit, lets get down to the hard hitting questions.

Whats up with the eggs?

Don't you think its a little weird that you leave eggs all over the damn place on the day celebrating Jesus' resurrection? I mean they do have an expiration date.

What is your connection with the man himself? Does he just really like over sized rabbits, or is this symbolic in some way?

Why do I keep on getting peeps? I hate those things and if I get them next year, I am setting traps in my house so I can catch your ass and make you eat all the non biodegradable peeps you have given me all these years! Sicko

Thats all the questions I want answered for now, maybe later I will grill the tooth ferry on why all my friends got five bucks for a tooth and I got two dimes and a nickel. Cheap ass tooth ferry.

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